


Till Death, Demon, or Alien Invasions Do Us Part

by secooper87



Series: The Child of Balime [18]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Doctor Who
Genre: F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-03
Updated: 2013-10-05
Packaged: 2017-12-28 06:49:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/989007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/secooper87/pseuds/secooper87
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ria's wedding is ruined.  And not just because she's President of the Slayers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The only thing worse than being perception-filter-style ignored for a year… was the moment the perception-filter stopped working.

Because _now_ … not only was Dawn's life going to hell.

Hell could see her.

"Dawn, why did you do that?" Xander shouted at her, through her earpiece, as she high-tailed it away from the cluster of demons that she'd just walked into the middle of. "It's broad daylight!"

Yeah, which would have been easy with the perception filter.

She'd just forgotten it wasn't working, anymore.

"I was trying to overhear what they were saying about the Arengor of Tertestus!" Dawn shouted back at Xander. Zipped down a blind alley. "I think they might have found it!"

A scream, from behind her, and Dawn glanced over her shoulder — to find Ria and a group of Slayers descending onto the demon group, hacking and slashing. The Slayers had this down to a science, now. Traditional Demons didn't stand a chance.

Ria stared at Dawn. A little shocked.

Dawn was just as shocked.

"What are _you_ doing here?" they both cried.

"I was following the plan," Ria said. Shot Dawn a funny look. "Remember? Feeding them a false location for the Arengor of Tertestus, so we could corner them and take them out?"

"What?" cried Dawn. She immediately felt about ten times stupider. "When did you guys decide that?"

"At the last planning meeting," said Ria. "On Monday. Weren't you there?"

Dawn wasn't.

Because, as it turned out, Michael —Ria's personal secretary — had forgotten that Dawn existed, again. And left her out.

"I'm sorry," said Michael, when Dawn confronted him about it, back at the Institute. "It's just… sometimes it feels like you're never here."

Which was, as it turned out, exactly the same excuse Dawn's boyfriend, Hank, made, when she went home and caught him in bed with another woman.

"How can you expect my needs to be satisfied when you're never around?" Hank asked her.

That was a line to end any relationship.

Dawn threw him out.

Sat down on her couch, head in her hands. Here she was. Being marginalized out of her job. With no more boyfriend. Her regular friends had basically forgotten her existence. And her best friend — the one who _hadn't_ forgotten her — was about to get married.

For the first time since she left Sunnydale… Dawn felt truly alone.

* * *

"…but I passed the tests!" Seo complained, as she left her ship. She turned on her mother. "I thought if I passed the tests, that gave me the right to run around time and space, by myself, as a fully qualified Time Lady." She grimaced. Then whispered, "And don't tell my father I'm calling myself a Time Lady, or he'll kill me."

Buffy came out of the ship, hands massaging her temples. "Yeah, that's if you'd aced the tests and been very obviously responsible and non-trouble-makery," she sighed. "But since that's obviously not the case, you need… supervision."

"Then I'll take Alison."

" _Adult_ supervision. _My_ supervision."

Seo crossed her arms. "But… that's not fair!" she whined. "What's the point in traveling around time and space when you have to do it with your mom?! That's not cool! That's just… weird."

Buffy gave a slow nod. "So hanging out with me on Earth is cool," she clarified, "but hanging out with me in time and space is… not cool?"

"Of course!"

Buffy sighed. Yeah. Okay. Whatever, Seo.

Seo looked off into the distance, a frown on her face. Then her eyes lit up. "Oh! Can I take Jack? Traveling with Jack would be cool!"

For a few moments Buffy couldn't speak.

"What?!" Buffy shouted. She waved her hands in the air. "Are you seriously saying that Jack's cooler than I am?!"

Seo cringed. "Well… um…" She shrugged. "A bit."

Oh, God.

"I'm a legendary Vampire-Slayer-apocalypse-preventer!" Buffy said. "That's very cool!"

"It's… Earth-style cool," Seo said.

Buffy had no idea what that meant.

"Yeah, well… you can't take Jack," Buffy decided. "Because Jack will make you take Ianto, and there's no way I'm going to let you… be… constantly exposed to the kinds of things they'd be getting up to in your ship."

Seo looked on at Buffy, totally blankly. "What does Jack like doing with Ianto?"

"And on that note," said Buffy, shutting the door to Seo's ship, "it's time for a wedding."

* * *

"If it were me," said Amanda, wielding the wedding bouquet, "I'd just do something like…" She somersaulted across the ground, then launched into a flip-kick, thrusting the bouquet downwards as if it were a weapon. "Right down his throat!"

Mindy sighed, grabbing the bouquet from Amanda. "Not if it's a Trotosort demon," she said, waving it, pointedly. "Their mouths are in weird places. You'd have to be more like this!"

She dove into a series of low kick high punch things, jamming the flowers down low in an instant where her invisible adversary's guard was down.

The flowers were yanked from her hand by the most recent passer-by.

"Or," said Ria, with an admonishing gaze, "you could save the heroics for the battlefield, and not practice during the preparations for a wedding celebration."

Mindy and Amanda both looked a little shame-faced.

"And anyways," Ria said, "you don't shove a wedding bouquet into a Trotosort Demon's _mouth_."

"Of course not," came a voice from down the hall. "Trotosort demon? They're all with the hay-fever. Shove a bouquet at its nose, and you can take him out while he's sneezing his head off." A shudder. "Except the battlefield becomes a pretty nasty snotfest. That wasn't one of my better days."

They all turned around. Ria's face lighting up in a delighted smile, as she turned to greet her latest guests.

"Buffy, Seo," she said, strolling over. "You came!" She stopped, just in front of them. "When I heard you were time traveling, I'd pretty much written you both off."

Whatever witty retort Buffy had to this died on her lips, as she saw Ria, again. Ria, with her arm in a sling, nasty burn-marks all across the left side of her body, and a scar running down the right side of her face.

Ria seemed to notice, too.

"Saxon," Ria explained, with a sigh. She shook her head. "Suppose I'm lucky to be alive. President Winters wasn't."

Seo went very still.

Buffy recovered herself. Planting a smile on her face. "It's barely noticeable," she said. "You look totally great. I mean, if you just—"

"I know what I look like," Ria cut in, an edge to her voice. She took a deep breath, her eyes meeting Buffy's. "The scarring… is permanent. Everyone says so." She gestured at her face. "Some 'blushing bride' I turned out to be."

Buffy faltered. Not sure what to say to this.

"Amazing, huh?" said Ria. "Toclafane were only around for a few minutes. Invasion was foiled before it even started." She gave a half shrug. "And it's still done all this to me. Ruined everything."

Buffy nodded. Gravely. "It's… not just you," she said. "You should talk to the Jones family, back in London. I have no idea what the Master did to them, in the few hours before he got stopped, but they're seriously traumatized."

And then there was Seo, who'd been acting weird even by her standards.

Buffy was worried about her.

"Funny how, sometimes, the easy-to-stop invasions can be even worse than the impossible-to-stop ones," Ria agreed.

Seo sprung forwards, a delighted beam on her face that seemed completely out of place with the conversation. "Is Aunt Dawn around?" she cried. "I call her Aunt Dawn, now. Because Mom said I couldn't call her 'the Good Dawn' and me 'the Evil Dawn'. I should find Aunt Dawn. That'd be brilliant, to catch up with Aunt Dawn. Don't you think?"

Then ran off.

Buffy looked after her. Worry creasing her face.

"Actually, while Seo's away," Ria told Buffy, leading her towards her office with her good arm, "there _is_ something I wanted to talk to you about. In private."


	2. Chapter 2

Dawn was trying to make it seem like she was totally fine with what Willow had done.

When, actually, she was on the point of screaming.

"I didn't realize you'd already done the work for it," Willow apologized. She shuffled the reports back together. "I just saw my advantage and took it. I wasn't really sure why Ria hadn't assigned anyone to deal with that whole frontal assault thing."

Dawn very pointedly smothered her frustration.

"Ria _did_ assign someone," Dawn said, very calmly. "She assigned me. But that's okay. I mean, if you've already taken care of it, that's one less thing on my plate, right?"

It shouldn't have bothered her, really.

It was just that… everyone at the Slayer Institute had so perfectly managed to compensate for her supposed 'not thereness'… that Dawn was beginning to realize…

Her job had disappeared.

Every time she had something to do… Dawn found that someone else was doing it, instead. Every routine she had was usurped by someone else. Every responsibility she'd assumed only she could carry out…

Someone else carried out.

Willow, apparently, had learned all the elements of Dawn's military-organizing job part way through last year. And just… kind of… hadn't mentioned it to Dawn.

"I guess I better go figure out what the Arengor of Tertestus is and what it does," Dawn muttered. "Unless you've already done _that_ one, too."

Willow opened her mouth to answer.

But was cut off by an exuberant—

"Aunt Dawn!"

Dawn swung around, and was tackled into a gigantic bear-hug that nearly knocked the wind right out of her.

Kennedy raced in and caught her, before Dawn toppled to the ground.

"Aunt Dawn — can I call you Aunt Dawn? Because I can't just call you Dawn — that'd be a bit rubbish, because that's my name — but I can call you Aunt Dawn, and then it just sounds like I'm named after you, and—"

Dawn finally managed to pry the rambling, chattering girl far enough out of the hug that she could actually breathe, again.

"Um… hi, Seo," Dawn gasped. Struggling, through her oxygen-deprived brain, to think of something appropriately aunt-like to say. "You're… still… really strong. You know that?"

Seo stepped back. Examining Dawn, carefully. "You look upset. Also, you're not perception-filtered, anymore. Is it really okay if I call you Aunt Dawn? Mom said I wasn't allowed to call you 'the Good Dawn', anymore, because she doesn't want me calling myself evil, and I didn't know what else to—"

"Did you have fun time traveling?" Willow cut in, before this could go too far.

Seo blinked.

Blinked again.

Then turned to Willow, clasping her hands behind her back. "Not… fun, exactly," she said. "Twirlfeen was okay, but…" She looked down at the ground. "We went back to 1860, where I met this brilliant person named Drusilla, except then Mom made me leave her in a convent so evil Angel could kill her, like history said. I was really upset about that. Drusilla was my friend."

Willow and Dawn looked at each other. Jaws dropping open.

"Oh, but I also saw Colonial America!" Seo said. "And scared off some vampires, there. That part wasn't so bad!" Then turned around, and skipped out of the room, trying to seem completely unaffected by everything she'd just said.

Willow and Dawn just gaped for a moment.

"Drusilla," Willow said. "Seo and Buffy… both met… Drusilla. In 1860."

Dawn gave a quiet laugh. "You know, I always _thought_ it was weird that Drusilla was so determined to kill Buffy before she ever even met her."

* * *

"So what's up?" Buffy asked, sitting down at Ria's desk.

Ria paced behind the desk, restlessly. "You used to be in this job," she said. Shook her head. "How did you do it? Just… balancing personal life with… this."

Buffy grimaced. "How did _I_ do it? Badly."

Ria gave a small laugh. "Must have done better than me."

"You're the one getting married," Buffy pointed out. "I never even got that far."

For a few moments, Ria said nothing.

"Mark's parents hate me, you know," Ria admitted. She put a hand up to her face, touching the scar, then firmly shoved the hand back down. "They think my career is offensive to their religion. Because we use so many religious icons to fight… various… forces of darkness."

Buffy cringed.

She hadn't thought of that.

"After the Slayer Jet crashed in Greenland, we had to fight off vampires, you know," said Ria. "Mark's parents found out. And now, I've been getting the 'Jesus died on that cross to absolve us of our sins — not so you could stick it into someone's heart' lecture. Bet you got that one all the time."

"Actually, not so much," Buffy admitted.

But considering she'd mostly dated vampires and not hard-core Christians, this wasn't too surprising.

Ria turned on Buffy, giving her a reassuring smile. "Sorry. I'm not trying to drag you into my problems. I just hoped… you'd have some words of wisdom or something." She lifted up a hand, to touch the scar on her face. "But I guess the real answer is… when you're President of the Slayers… you can't ever really have a normal personal life."

Buffy looked down at her lap.

"Yeah," she whispered.

Ria composed herself. Stepped forwards, leaning down to look right in Buffy's eyes. "Thing is… the Demon Civil War is still going on. And I'm a target. I've nearly been assassinated fourteen times, so far. Fifteen, if you count Saxon." She sat down behind her desk, clasping her hands in front of her. "And with the wedding…"

"You decided to call me in to handle the demons for you," Buffy guessed.

Ria nodded.

Looked out the window, a whimsical look on her face. "It's my wedding day, Buffy," Ria said, her voice a little sad. "I can't be the blushing bride with the beautiful face. With the broken arm, I can't have a honeymoon of wild passion. And I'm pretty sure 'safe sex' is going to involve a semi-automatic under the pillow. But—"

"Wait, are you asking me to sub for you while you're on your honeymoon?" Buffy cut in. "In addition to being a bodyguard for you during your wedding day?"

"I…" Ria started. Then noticed the expression on Buffy's face, and turned away, shaking her head. "No. It was a stupid idea. You've got a kid and a time machine, of course you wouldn't—"

"I'll do it," Buffy cut in, before she had a chance to connect brain to mouth.

Ria stared at her. A look of utter gratefulness in her eyes. "Really?"

Which was right around the time brain _did_ connect to mouth, and Buffy realized she'd just massively screwed herself over. Damn. If there was one thing she totally _didn't_ want to do, it was run the Slayer Institution, again.

She'd hated doing that back when she'd founded the damn thing.

Ria leaned over the desk. "Thing is… the Demon Civil War," she said, her voice very low. "Right now, it's a little more complicated than you think."

Oh, God.

Buffy forgot how much she hated doing this.

"There's a mystical amulet," Ria continued. "The Arengor of Tertestus. We don't know what it looks like, or what it does, but it's the Traditional Demons' last hope in this war."

"And if they already have it," Buffy realized, "they're going to see your wedding as the perfect chance to test it out."

Ria nodded.

Yeah. Buffy really, _really_ forgot how much she hated this.

"Couldn't you get Dawn to do this?" Buffy asked.

"I… need Dawn with me," Ria admitted. "Dawn's my Maid of Honor. And… she's… also my best friend."

And that look on Ria's face… was a look that Buffy knew so well. It was the look of someone who'd woken up in a cold sweat too many times, having dreamt of burying her best friend in the ground…

The look vanished in an instant.

"Please," Ria said, to Buffy. "I just want this wedding to go perfectly. That's all. I…" She looked down at the top of her desk. "I love Mark. More than anything. I want to become his wife."

Buffy was quiet for a long time.

Then put a hand on Ria's good arm. And smiled.

"Yeah," said Buffy. "Sure. I'll help out. Anything you need."


	3. Chapter 3

It was considered, by all, to be 'the Slayer Wedding'.

And not just because all the Slayers at the Institute were invited.

"Where's _Ria's_ family?" Seo whispered, at the formal dinner gathering two nights before the ceremony. It was supposed to be a family gathering — and while Seo could see Mark's family, Ria's family appeared to just be… Slayers.

"She doesn't have any," Dawn admitted. She looked away from her best friend. "Ria came from a real stay-in-town kind of family. They were all together when the vampires attacked. Ria was the only survivor."

"Yeah, but _we're_ her family, now!" Amanda insisted.

"And having all the Slayers as your family makes you have the coolest family ever!" Mindy added.

The two high-fived each other, across the table.

It became even more apparent as the preparations and everything continued. Particularly at the dress rehearsal for the wedding — which Dawn dragged Buffy and Seo along to.

Robson, one of the only Watchers to survive Caleb's attack back in 2003, had volunteered to be the one to escort Ria down the aisle. Dawn was Maid of Honor. Willow and Kennedy had gotten roles as the secondary bridesmaids. And… much to her horror…

Faith was a flower girl.

"Don't say a word!" Faith hissed at Buffy, while dressed up in her lacy pink dress for the wedding rehearsal. Her eyes were bitter and glaring.

Buffy had to hide her face not to crack up.

"Seriously," said Faith, bracing her bouquet in the air. "You wanna find out how hard I can hit someone with this?"

"Who's the other flower girl?" Buffy asked, pointing at the small child-sized outfit still hanging up beside Faith.

"A Graske," said Faith, shrugging.

As it turned out, the Graske and Faith weren't the most surprising choice of role for the bridal bunch.

"This new model — it's got this thing it does called 'apps', and there's an app for _everything_!" said the small demon, Yulch, as he showed Seo his iPhone. "It's the latest model, and only just—"

"I know," Seo cut in. "My friend Alison has one."

Yulch flipped through screens. "So far, I've got a Hellmouth Opening app, a demon lexicon, the necronomicon, an app that describes the best way to demon-style butcher a large groups of humans, and Frogger!"

Seo nodded, slowly.

Yulch was dressed up in a little-boy tux, ring-bearing stuff on the seat beside him. However, he seemed far more interested in his iPhone than in the wedding.

"Why are _you_ part of the ceremony, anyways?" Seo asked him.

Yulch looked up from his iPhone, almost offended. "She _had_ to include at least one demon," he said. "After all. It's the Slayer Wedding."

"Yeah, one demon and one alien," Willow told Buffy, in the back room. "Politics. You know. Ria's trying to juggle all of her alliances. Keep everyone happy."

"Even on her wedding day?" asked Buffy.

" _Especially_ on her wedding day," Willow muttered.

Willow was in charge of seating arrangements.

Which, you'd think, would be boring.

But you'd be wrong.

"See, I can't put the Ogron next to the Vertuniptus Demon," said Willow, tapping her pencil against the desk, "because the Vertuniptus Demons can't stand the Ogrons. There'd be entrails everywhere before we got to the first course."

"I thought Vertuniptus Demons can't stand _anyone_ ," Buffy pointed out.

Actually, she was pretty sure most of the species Ria was inviting to her wedding were massively hostile.

"Yeah, and that's why our alliance with them is so important," Willow replied. She stared down at the seating plan, her face bent into an even deeper frown. Then scribbled something in pencil. "I guess I could seat the Ogrons at the Traditional Demons' table. I mean, Ogrons aren't great at conversation anyways. I don't think anyone will get too offended."

"Ria's inviting the Traditional Demons to this wedding, too?!" Buffy cried. "But they're her enemies!"

"Yeah, trust me, we know," Willow muttered.

Another odd thing about the wedding was that… despite the large number of people who were scrambling around, trying to make this wedding happen… Dawn had nothing to do.

Which, to Dawn, was just… weird!

"I thought I was supposed to be Maid of Honor or whatever!" Dawn insisted. "Bridesmaid in Chief! There has to be something I can do!"

But all the jobs had been assigned elsewhere.

"That's what happens when you wear a perception filter for a year," Dawn huffed, sitting down on a bench beside Buffy and crossing her arms. "You get mega ignored, until… you're just not even part of people's lives anymore."

"I thought you said Ria hadn't been ignoring you," Buffy pointed out.

Dawn stared into the distance, at Ria — who was desperately trying to juggle the wedding rehearsal, the barrage of complaints from Mark's parents, and the Graske, who kept trying to cause serious mischief when no one was looking.

"She's got enough on her plate already," Dawn sighed.

Ria turned to them. "Dawn," she called, gesturing beside herself. "I need you here."

For a moment, a grin lit up Dawn's face, as she raced over, ready to make herself useful. A grin that died, as Mark's parents came up to Ria, once more, shouting that they felt absolutely affronted by conducting a wedding ceremony — in a church — that featured both a Graske and a Hell Demon! And this was accompanied by Faith kicking the Graske very hard with her high-heel, before the Graske could sneak off and tie Mark's shoe-laces together, and…

Dawn was forgotten, once more.

The seat beside Buffy was quickly filled, and Buffy glanced over to see her daughter. Who was sitting forwards, studying the scene in front of her intently.

"I thought you'd be with the Graske, stirring up trouble," Buffy muttered.

Seo had a deep look of intense concentration on her face. "Aunt Dawn," she said, softly. "She's… like me, right? The seventh segment of the Key to Time. An unstable element of the universe."

Buffy glanced over at Seo. "Huh?"

"I know the reason _I'm_ stable is because I don't belong in this universe," Seo continued. "An independent element. But Aunt Dawn isn't." Her frown deepened. "So… why's _she_ stable, right now?"

"The Doctor just said as long as she was on Earth, she'd be stable," Buffy provided. "He never gave a reason." She looked Seo over, even more curiously. "Is this important?"

Seo said nothing for a long moment.

"Have you ever seen someone so unhappy," Seo whispered, at long last, "that you just know… you _need_ to make things better for them, again?"

Buffy looked at Ria.

"Yes," she said.

* * *

Buffy felt for Ria.

Really felt for Ria.

Watching as Ria tried desperately to juggle way too many responsibilities at once, as she attempted to please everyone she allied with, attempted to please every human and alien and demon — no matter how hostile.

And then… Ria would catch a glimpse of herself in the mirror, sometimes.

And turn away, sharply.

"Yeah, I never knew she was so vain," Kennedy agreed, when Buffy pointed it out. "I mean, they're just battle scars. We all get them."

Buffy shook her head.

That wasn't the point. And Buffy knew it.

"I think it's like… my running for Prom Queen, back when I was in high school," Buffy tried to explain to Xander. "Doing a job like being President of the Slayers — you've got to have _something_ in your life that's normal. I guess for Ria… since she wasn't a Slayer… it was her ability to kind of blend in. Look like everyone else."

But Ria never would, again.

From now on, everyone would know — just by looking at her — that she was different. A survivor. A fighter.

"Yeah, that's great, Buff," said Xander, getting up from his computer. "But the leader of the Traditional Demon army just called and had a problem with the menu for the reception dinner, so I need to find a demon caterer that isn't a mass murderer pretty fast."

Buffy stared at him. "Couldn't you just _not_ invite the super-hostile demons and aliens?!"

"We have to!" said Xander, racing off. "Very complicated!"

"Ria's fine, Buffy," Willow insisted, when Buffy told her about her worries. "She's got tons of attachments to normal human stuff. I mean, she's getting married to a human, right?"

"Yeah, in a wedding that's become a crazy demon-alien-alliance nightmare!" said Buffy. She shook her head. "I mean, geeze! This is supposed to be Ria's special day. And she's going to spend it trying to please the garggledome's exiled emperor or something."

"Gargadon," Willow corrected.

Buffy gave Willow a pointed stare. Crossed her arms.

Willow sighed. "I know, I know!" she said. "We're just doing our best."

"Your best for whom?" said Buffy. "It's Ria's wedding. This is all about _her and Mark_ , not—"

"But it isn't!" Willow cut in, sharply. Turning on Buffy, a fire inside of her. "Don't you see, Buffy? It can't be! Ever! And it's all Saxon's fault."

Buffy frowned. "What? Why…?"

"Because of those scars!" Willow snapped. A look of pure frustration washing across her. "Don't you get it, Buffy? Saxon — who didn't even get past the planning stage of his apocalypse scheme — managed to shoot Ria down. Injure her. That _means_ something."

Oh.

Oh, no.

"This _isn't_ a wedding," said Willow. "Can't be. Not anymore. It's a show of strength. From Ria. And the Slayers."

Buffy felt the horror flooding over her. "A… show of strength…"

"It has to be," Dawn agreed, coming into the room. She put her hands into her pockets. Slouching, a little morosely. "If these guys think Ria's injured or unable to defend herself, they're gonna turn on her. Every single group of aliens and demons. All at once. She's gonna die."

"And so's the world," Willow added.

Buffy frowned.

"You saw how it was before, Buffy — with all those demons and aliens always trying to end the world, all the time," said Dawn. "Ria's stopped most of that. And she's done it by showing her strength — muscling tons of adverse alien and demon races into allying with us."

"But that only works while they're scared of her and the Slayers," Willow said.

"And since the Master managed to sabotage the plane…" Buffy began.

Dawn nodded. "Yeah. He ruined her wedding."

Wow. That sucked.

But the explanation did made a whole lot of things make more sense.

It explained why Ria was shoving her fiercest warriors and most powerful people up front, at the wedding ceremony, even when she had to stick them into flower girl outfits to do so. Why Ria was inviting so many hostile races that were a lot more inclined to wipe out humanity than to make peace with it. Why Ria wanted someone legendary like Buffy floating around, and why she'd called the Doctor over to pick up Buffy's wedding invitation.

A show of strength.

To make sure everyone — both alien and demon — knew who they were messing with, if they went against the Slayers.

(What a way to kill the romance of a wedding!)

"Ria wasn't kidding when she said this wedding had to go perfectly," Buffy muttered. Shook her head. "God, I hate Saxon. Even more than before."

Willow and Dawn looked at one another.

Couldn't disagree.


	4. Chapter 4

Morning of the wedding.

Held inside a church in the middle of the Ohio countryside — several hours drive away from Cleveland.

Ria had already gotten dressed in her wedding dress. Dawn was now helping her to make sure her hair and makeup and everything were all in place. While, in the meantime, Ria's secretary — Michael — was reading out a list of notes and problems they were having seating all the guests in the church.

"Well, of course he's angry — you don't greet a Mougra demon like that!" Dawn cut in, before Michael had even finished. "In Mougran, the word 'heya' means 'I'm gonna eat your mother.'" She rolled her eyes. Turned to Ria. "I better take care of this by myself."

Michael seemed a little alarmed. "You… speak… Mougran?"

"She learned it a few months ago," Ria said. Turning back to her mirror, uncapping the lipstick. "Don't you remember?"

Michael hesitated. It was clear he didn't.

Dawn left the room, rushing out to try to placate the Mougra demon, but discovered… her job had already been done for her.

By Seo.

"So… you speak Mougran," said Dawn, leaning against a wall of the church. She shook her head, trying to bite back her bitterness at being cut out of the picture yet again. "I should have known. I guess that's the reason I learned it so fast."

Dawn should have known there was something weird about that. She'd always been good at languages, but she'd never gone from nothing to fluent with just a month of haphazard study before.

Seo looked on at Dawn. Seeming very concerned.

"I… don't… speak Mougran very well," Seo said, quietly. "In fact, I speak it pretty rubbishly. Just like I'm certainly not very good at any of the other languages you know! Like, I'm pretty rubbish at speaking Vlortech and…"

"Wait, how did you know I spoke that?" Dawn cut in.

Seo froze. Deer-trapped-in-the-headlights style.

"It was just… something… I heard," Seo said. "Faith was mentioning that at the bachelorette party, last night, they were all gossiping and it… came up… or…"

"Bachelorette party?!" Dawn cried.

She'd thought that Ria had decided not to _have_ a bachelorette party!

Why hadn't she even known about this?!

"I've just mucked things up, haven't I?" Seo said. She cringed. "I have a habit of doing that."

"No, no, it's not you," Dawn insisted. "It's just…" she buried her face in her hands. "God, my life sucks right now."

Her best friend didn't even invite her to her bachelorette party. And if Dawn blew up at Ria about this, the way she wanted to, then that'd just be putting even more pressure on someone who'd already gotten her wedding day pretty much guaranteed to be the least beautiful day of her life, and…

Yeah.

Dawn definitely couldn't face going back to Ria, right now.

"I better go… talk to… Hngratib," said Dawn, spotting the Tech Demon leader in the crowd. "Make sure everything goes smoothly with him."

Then darted away.

Trying not to think about her sucky life too hard.

* * *

Buffy had sent Seo to the wedding.

While Buffy, herself, was out on patrol duty. Trying to do her bit for Ria.

The weird thing was that… it was getting pretty close to wedding-time… and Buffy had seen _nothing_ out here. Like, seriously. _Nothing_.

"But Willow's right," Buffy muttered. "To the demons, Ria's accident is going to come across as weakness. There should be monsters all over the place, right now. A whole army getting ready to storm the church."

* * *

The wedding march played, as Ria walked down the aisle, Robson's arm hooked with her own bad one. Robson carefully holding it in place, so Ria wouldn't need to wear a cast or sling.

No signs of weakness.

Ria had a smile spread across her face. Almost convincing, unless you knew her very well. The most amazing day of her life… and thanks to Saxon, it had been reduced to this.

Then she caught Mark's eyes.

And her smile morphed into a genuine one. Her eyes dancing with affection and a deep, deep love that shone through her.

* * *

Buffy was sitting on a boulder, kicking her legs, trying to decide if she'd spent enough time patrolling to determine that there was nothing to worry about, outside, and she could go back and try to catch the rest of the wedding ceremony.

Movement from Buffy's right.

Buffy sprung to her feet in an instant, racing after the blur, fast as she could.

* * *

Most of the speeches were long-winded and annoying. Seo found herself yawning, struggling to keep her eyes open.

She bet Mom was having a lot more fun, staying outside and fighting demons.

Even _Faith_ looked like she was having more fun — trying to keep that Graske in line. Seo was with the Graske. Any mischief would be better than boringness like this.

Why did people ever even _want_ to get married?!

Seo decided she'd much rather be wandering around getting herself into trouble.

"I've been asked by the bride and groom to allow them to exchange their own vows," the priest-looking guy said. He gestured at Ria and Mark.

Mark cringed, a little, looking out at the crowd. Cleared his throat, nervously. Then turned back to his note-cards, trying not to think about his audience.

"Ria," he said. Looked deep into her eyes. "Until I met you, I used to think the Earth was a pretty safe place, and that apocalypses were few and far between."

All the Slayers snickered at this.

"I guess I was wrong about that," Mark said.

More snickering.

"I can still remember the day we met," Mark continued. "Those little… skunk-looking aliens, wandering around… trying to end the world…"

"Kimhors," Faith muttered.

"…I was too petrified to move, surrounded by monsters," Mark continued, "and you smacked me across the face to snap me out of it. Then dragged me off and saved the world." He smiled. "And since then… I've never wanted to be with anyone else."

Ria's cheeks flushed, and she gave a small laugh.

"I don't know how I was lucky enough to get you," Mark told her. "But I thank heaven, every day, that I did. You're the best thing that's ever happened to my life, and I love you more than I can say."

The Slayers all "awwed".

Mark reached down towards the ring that Yulch offered him, on the red cushion.

* * *

Buffy tackled the demon to the ground. "Okay, bud," she said. "Show's over. I know all about your…"

Buffy stopped.

As she noticed the face.

"Wait a second," said Buffy. "You're… that… Izzaphena person. On Facebook! The one who runs that 'Demons For Reform' page!"

The square-faced demon struggled to free herself from Buffy, frantically.

"But you Tech Demons are the good guys!" Buffy shouted. "You're supposed to be…"

Stopped.

And realized… Izzaphena hadn't been running _towards_ the church. But _away from_ it.

"Ria is weak," Izzaphena said. "Everyone knows it. Even that Harold Saxon almost took her down, and _his_ invasion plan was defeated in under a minute."

Uh… yeah. But that was only because it was foiled by a legendary Time Lord who happened to be a genius!

"So… what?" Buffy said, grabbing a little bit tighter. "You're going to have some demon rush out onto the stage and try to maul her? There are Slayers all over that church! You'd never…!"

Buffy paused.

Realizing…

No, of course they wouldn't do that. They'd be smart about this. Learn from Ria, herself.

"You're luring Ria into a trap," Buffy realized.

Izzaphena grinned. "The Arengor of Tertestus," she whispered. "The Traditional Demons were looking for it. But we Tech Demons found it first."

The Arengor of Tertestus.

Ria had mentioned that. Some powerful amulet.

"Oh, and it's powerful!" said Izzaphena. "If the Traditional Demons could even grasp what that amulet can do! But their armies, holed up in that church, will be powerless. Our own will prevail."

"What… does it do?" Buffy asked, warily.

Izzaphena beamed. Her entire face a gloat waiting to be spilled. "Once bonded, fully — it transforms the wearer," she said, "into a pure-blood demon." Her eyes twinkled. "Imagine! All Ria's intelligence and strategy! In the hands of a gigantic demon, ready and waiting to swallow the world!"

Oh, God.

Oh, God!

"Where's the amulet?" Buffy demanded. "What are you doing with it? How are you making sure Ria…?"

Then it flashed before her.

Yulch. That little demon, one of the leaders of the Tech Demon army… acting as ring-bearer…

"It's the wedding ring," Buffy realized. Dropping Izzaphena onto the ground. "The Arengor of Tertestus. You swapped it with Ria's wedding ring."

Izzaphena grinned.

"You're going to destroy Ria," said Buffy, "on the best day of her life, using… her…"

Buffy stumbled back.

Then turned.

And ran.


	5. Chapter 5

"…Tech Demons have asked me to say a few words," Ria said. Her eyes catching theirs, a small smile of appreciation and diplomacy on her lips. "A poem from an ancient demonic language, written to commemorate nuptials in their culture." She raised up her head, and began to chant.

Dawn had expected Ria to recite strange words in a strange tongue.

But… thing was…

Ria was speaking Vlortech.

A demon language Dawn actually knew!

And Dawn just stared at Ria, as the words issued from her lips. Words Dawn knew. Understood. And they definitely weren't about weddings. Not at all!

The ring around Ria's finger began to pulse with a faint light.

The door to the church slammed open, and Buffy rushed in, fast as she could. "Stop the wedding!" she shouted. "It's a trick!"

Everyone gasped, staring at Buffy in amazement.

Buffy pointed at Yulch. "He switched the wedding ring for the Arengor of Tertestus! It's going to turn you into a Mayor-Style demon! They're trying to destroy you!"

Dawn blinked. "Uh… Buffy?" she said. "That's… not what the spell said it was doing."

Buffy stared at her. "It's not?"

Dawn shook her head. "That ring. If you know the Vlortech — it seems to just be a small-scale healing amulet."

Ria finished reciting the chant, and the ring pulsed light across her body. Gathering around her broken arm. Then Ria turned to her audience, a self-confident smile on her face.

The Tech Demons suddenly had a look of utter horror on their faces.

"But that was the Arengor of Tertestus!" Yulch cried. "I know it was! I saw—"

"Well, of course it was," Ria said. "But the Arengor of Terestus is just a healing amulet." Stepping forwards, testing out her now-healed arm just to make sure the amulet had done its job. "You don't think I spread those rumors about it turning people into demons by accident, did you?"

There was a loud clunking sound, as the Slayers all gathered around and sealed off the perimeter of the church.

Ria reached back behind herself, and yanked a gigantic alien-looking gun out of the train of her bridal gown.

"Thing is… I had a really useful bachelorette party, last night," she said. Her eyes narrowing on the crowd of hostile aliens and demons. "In which we finalized our wedding battle plans." Her voice dropped. "Still think I'm weak?"

Then, in a coordinated swoop of Slayers and weapons and shouting, the entire church erupted in violence. Ria shouting at Dawn to "get Mark and the others to safety!" as she led the charge, racing in to take out the monsters who'd wanted to murder her.

Dawn was a little too shocked to speak.

But felt a hand on her sleeve, as someone appeared beside her, helping her bring Mark and his friends and family to safety. A small blond girl, carrying a sonic lock pick.

Seo.

She and Dawn fought off the demon and alien hordes, while ushering the others out the door, then threw themselves through, Seo using her lock pick to jam it shut behind them.

For a few seconds, she and Dawn just stood there. Leaning with their backs against the door, listening to the sounds of the battle going on inside.

"I can't believe Ria didn't tell me!" Dawn said, when she could manage to say something. She pointed at the door. "I mean, I could totally have helped…!"

"You speak Vlortech," Seo replied. "That's why she didn't tell you." Shrugged. "Ria wanted the demons to know that, whatever happened to her, physically, she could always outsmart and outmaneuver them. Your reaction to Mom's outburst gave them that message."

Dawn blinked.

Blinked again.

Sometimes, Ria was way too strategic for her.

"You feel useless, here," Seo observed.

Dawn's hands clenched into fists. "I'm _not_ useless!" she insisted. "I mean, I know tons of stuff about aliens and demons and—"

"Do you want to come with me?" Seo asked.

Dawn stopped.

Stared.

Unable to speak for a moment.

"Huh?!"

"Mom says I need adult supervision," said Seo. "And traveling around time and space with a cool aunt sounds a lot more fun than traveling around time and space with Mom."

Dawn hadn't expected this.

Like, seriously hadn't expected this.

"I… I'd love to," Dawn said. "But I can't." She sighed. "The Doctor says I'm an unstable part of the Key to Time. I can't leave Earth, or—"

"But you're stable on Earth, right?" said Seo. She gave a small laugh. "Haven't you ever wondered why?"

Dawn had.

Didn't know the answer.

"It's because of me," said Seo. " _I'm_ here. _I'm_ stabilizing you."

Dawn stared.

"Huh?!"

"When I first arrived on Earth, I was sacrificed to a demon," Seo explained. "It caused my essence to mix with the Earth, across all of time. Past, present, and future." She grinned. "My father must have known that, back when he first met you. He just didn't say anything."

Dawn couldn't speak for a long moment.

"But don't you see what this means?" Seo continued. "You _can_ travel through time and space. So long as you're with _me_!"

Oh.

"While you're with me, you'll always be stable," Seo continued. "We can go off and get into trouble and fight evil monsters and save worlds! You'll know all about the demons and monsters, and Mom won't have to worry about me heading into the universe by myself." Her eyes glowed. "So… what do you say?"

"I… uh…" Dawn gave a small laugh. "Oh, what the hell! Of course I wanna go!"

Seo leapt forwards and swooped her aunt into a tight hug.

"My first traveling companion," Seo whispered.

* * *

Ria, a few hours later, emerged from the church. Covered with alien and demon blood, her wedding dress in tatters… but a radiant smile on her face.

She took Mark by the arm.

"I've shown my strength," Ria said. She disarmed her gun, and set it aside. "Now. Let's go get married for real."


End file.
